Match Report

The match started in usual Italian style - they surrendered and we were two up in twenty minutes to great runs and finishes from Paul "complete metamorphisis" Tanton. A rather clumsy challenge from "Little Legs" Holland (probably out of sexual frustration from getting hold of a sixteen year old the night before) brought about their first goal. Andy said he was concussed at the time which probably explains why he had a good game.

An unforgivable open goal miss by Carlos "Hexagon Head" O'Connor more than likely inspired him to go on and complete a deserved hat-trick and a penalty miss by "Paul Tanton" prevented Dave from doing the same thing. Another penalty miss by fat bloke Porter (this one cleared the cricket pitch) along with a string of fine saves from their keeper kept the score from double figures. The sixth and final goal was one to be treasured. An inspiring run past two players and a defence splitting ball by yours truly (come and get me Second team) sent Mr Blobby on his way, he used his speed and wasted two defenders and the centre backs could only look on in envy as this marvellously formed athlete graced the middle of the pitch. The keeper rushed out, but in vain. An exquisite 25 yard lob finished the move. Andy Harrold had scored with virtually his first touch. The crowd went mental as Blobby mania struck Farnborough Village.

In whole it was a great performance from a makeshift side and a deserved Man of the Match performance by Karl "Regatty" Queiros keeps him in selection contention. Also a big shout going out to the Rottweiler, Dave "Can't afford to pay the fine" Power - you should have hit him, mate!

Report: Ming the Almighty and all powerful (I.D.I.C.)

The Manager's View
This week we took a break from the League with a Charity Cup fixture against local Inter Milan look-alikes L'Ombrello, with yet more selection problems from Saturday afternoon with Dave (I've already got the 2nd team kit) Bandell dropping out as well as Des Lindsay! But with Dave Power and special guest star Dave Garratty playing we had a very good chance. With the "Dream Team" in place and ready to go we got off to the start we wanted with Dave Garratty running through to score and within 15 minutes it was 2-0 with Dave netting his second of the match.

At this stage Messr Tanton was extremely worried when asked if he would buy the beers if his impersonator scored once more! Now leading 2-0 we gave away a penalty after a bad back pass left Andy Holland in trouble which lead to him taking out the opposing forward. Shortly after this we regained our two goal advantage when Carlos scored after playing a
clever one-two off the oppositions centre half's wedding tackle.

Before I tell you about the second half, the prize for ‘miss of the year’ had already been won by Carlos after guiding a header wide from three yards when it was easier to score.

In the second half we carried on where we left off in the first half with Carlos completing his hat-trick with two well taken goals. This then prompted a master tactical change with Mr Blobby himself Andy Harrold replacing Carlos and with his first touch of the ball after being put through by Shaun (Fu Man Chu) Keddle, Andy outpaced a defender to calmly chip the ball over the stranded goalkeeper into the top corner from 20 yards out, take note the Sumo Wrestler still knows how to finish.

This week Andy signed the Match Card as P. Gascoigne as he felt his build and talent resembled that of the Mars Bar Muncher from Italy, than Ryan (Where's the Sheep?) Giggs.

Finally I would like to say what a good performance it was from the team, especially from a very solid back four including Dave Power at right back and Karl Queiros at left back who also won ‘Man of the Match’ with a very impressive performance.

Next week it's another cup game so let's give the same performance and do what we know we should do and win.