Match Report

What a lovely day for a game of vets football. Boiling hot with a rock hard ground, just right for a bunch of geriatric ex-athletes. Still the old lady walking her dog looked excited at the thought of watching 22 old fellas running around in skin tight shorts.

The game started at walking pace with Chris and Pat in midfield snapping at the opposition’s ankles like a couple of terriers. Colin and Chris did their best to make space out wide, but unfortunately they failed to make an impact on the game as the passes they received often came at them at breakneck speed.

Trevor, Steve, and Colesy in defence were finding it difficult to keep the opposition strikers in check. Their faces began to resemble the colour of our shirts, but desperate last ditch tackles kept Toby protected in goal. Toby looked reluctant to dive on the hard ground, can’t think why - he has plenty of protection to cushion the impact.

Our strikeforce of Paul and Storkey were starved of service but ran tirelessly in an effort to trouble the opposition goal.

As the first half drew to a close we all thought the ambulance had arrived with the oxygen cylinder, but it had been called to an injury on neighbouring pitch. Thankfully it was not a serious incident.

The first half ended without any score. I would like to say this was due to excellent defence, but in all honesty it was due to the fact that no one had enough energy to have a shot on goal. Fortunately we still had our club captain to come on and our new weapon “Mr Bond”.

The opposition seemed more concerned about arguing with the ref than playing football. The ref was only trying to help the game to flow, but I think all the players were becoming reliant upon the game stopping to get their breath back.

As the second half progressed the lady and her dog decided to take their leave, but not before it cocked its leg against the dug-out. The dog I mean not the lady.

As we tired our goal came under increasing pressure, and as normal our standard of play deteriorated as the game reached its 80th minute. The gap between defence and midfield got bigger and the opposition sneaked 2 freakish goals. But all was not lost as we broke from our own half with a flowing move and Toby found himself in front of an empty goal. This was it, the goal at his mercy, but no, an awful bobble and the chance was missed. Just to make matters worse they scored another goal as our heads dropped and the final whistle beckoned.

Still no serious injuries, but still no win.